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Sunday, October 6, 2013

Day 6: Surrender

The summer of 2000 began a journey of explosive inner transformation in my life. This period was marked by changes in my thoughts. Lies I had believed were replaced with truth and specific themes that altered my perspective and how I lived emerged.

After the school year ended and I began summer break, I was sick in bed for about a week. During that week of bed rest I read and journaled. I became aware that ever since the "rug had been pulled out" and I had experienced a series of unfortunate events over a decade earlier, I had been living with a self-protective stance. My decisions and my interactions with people were guided by a core promise to myself never to let people "treat me so badly" again. This soul level promise was in conflict with the promise I had made to God years earlier to serve Him with my life. As I tried to keep both promises, I experienced inner conflict.

As I lay on my bed, I wrote a prayer of surrender to God. I acknowledged that I was unable to protect myself and that running my life in an effort to do so was not working. I surrendered myself to God's ability to care for me (He is so much more capable than I!) and I asked Him to teach me how to live as He desired rather than trying to protect myself.

That prayer opened a door to many marvelous transformative steps in my life. The first ones came out of a trip to Belize that summer. I'll talk more about that tomorrow.

I would love to hear your stories of transformational pivot points!


  1. 'Lies I had believed were replaced with truth' ... don't you love when this happens?

  2. I have never been brave enough to let God protect me, instead of myself. Interesting, something to think about. Can't wait to read about your trip tomorrow to Belize

  3. Hi Anonymous, it wasn't an easy thing to do and I have had to do it more than once, as it is easy to seek to protect myself.

    One other thing I didn't mention is that God at times led me to do things that were self-protective - especially to establish boundaries and to act with wisdom and discernment in potentially dangerous situations. That is different than the methods I had been using to protect myself.